Last Wednesday I started a cleanse. Most people set a New Year’s resolution to change their diet, but my birthday is in January and so I never do that. February is a good month for me, and this year I waited until after Valentine’s Day!
Some people ask me, “Why do you do this when you cut so many foods out anyway?”
And my answer is, “I want my body to function as optimally as possible.”
Because I have a chronic illness, this takes a lot of work. Throughout the year, I reintroduce new foods to see if my body can handle it. Then some coconut milk ice cream, tortilla chips and popcorn slip in. To many people these little changes are no big deal. And yet for me, it’s helpful when these foods are purged for a complete month out of the year, for my body to reset.
It’s helpful to eat very simply again: meats, vegetables, soups, healthy fats and minimal fruit. No baking. Eating out less often. Declining some people’s invitations.
I used to think these decisions felt like “missing out.” Now my body’s wisdom just tells me that simplifying is what it really wants. And the benefits of the cleanse can be felt within a few days: less brain fog, deeper, more restful sleep, greater concentration, and more energy. And if I’m honest, these are the gifts I truly long for.
It’s scary to cut back at first. I know that the first step is facing into how tired I actually am, even with all the improvements in my health. There’s still fatigue there, and some days it’s still a lonely reality. Yet healing does start with observing, noticing, and lingering with reality, in whatever form it chooses to be.
So for the next four weeks, I’m intentionally making room. Making room to focus on myself, to be present in my fatigue, to celebrate healing and to say no. I’m choosing to be more still, to move more slowly, to sink into yoga more deeply.
I thought that when I started this healing journey, that healing meant back to doing more. It’s actually come to mean, making space for doing less. Simplifying actually brings greater layers of wholeness into my life.